The Big Game

Hello,

The latest shots of me playing football. The first shot is me tackling, and heading the ball off side.

The second is when I went up against three little people defending my team.

They call me the Woofing Winger!

Hello

Today, I got my own football shirt. Mom put it on me and it looks real cool. I don't normally like to wear anything because dogs that wear clothes, in my opinion, are pussy's. But it's the same colour as the England team, white. And it's number 23, the same number as Beckham, except I'm called Barkham. So, as it's football, I don't mind wearing the shirt. Mom has started to call me Lizzie Barkham.

Today I went for my first football practice with the boys from the local primary school. These boys are a bit bigger than the little people I normally play with and they're faster. They like to play with me because it helps them pick up their speed. Well, that's what they say. Tom is my favourite player. I met Tom in the park. Tom is my friend and the one who asked Mom if I could play football with them. Tom wears a white shirt too and sometimes he comes to pick me up and we go practice our tackling skills in the park together. I love Tom and I feel really happy when he comes to pick me up and we're both wearing the same colour shirts going to the park. Tom's a good player but I'm faster than he is at tackling. Tom says that I can help him pick up his speed. We tackle for ever; in and out and under his feet I go. Sometimes he kicks it up in the air for me and I head the ball back across to him. Other times he'll make a run for it and I run around the pitch and intercept him before he gets to the goal. It's so exciting. Nothing excites me more than football. With Tom we practice for a long time.

Today we had a short practice before the game. I couldn't wait to get out on the pitch. It was so amazing. I ran around like a maniac. I tackled and defended well, until another boy managed to get away from me with the ball and head down the pitch like thunder. I wasn't too happy. I had to run along the out side of the field, cut in and out of a couple of other players and then intercept. Just as he was about to hammer it into the goal, I managed to get to the ball and head it off side. You'd have to see it to believe it. Mom cheered, she was so proud. The boy who I intercepted made a dive for it and landed on the ground. 'Spectacular' my Mom said. She said she couldn't believe it, that I could play so well. Tom came over and patted me on the back and the other boys cheered me on. They kept calling my name, Barkham, Barkham. It was cool.

We played for what felt like forever, until I headed the ball and bit my tongue. I was taken off. And I wasn't too happy about that either. My tongue was bleeding bad. Mom tried to tell the coach that it happens sometimes. She says, I nose the ball hard and I bite my tongue and but it heals quickly. The coach wasn't having any of that. After a few minutes the bleeding stopped but he wouldn't let me back on. I kept pulling on the lead to go back on but I knew he was right and I was knackered anyway. The saliva was pouring out of my mouth. We said goodbye to Tom and Mom took me back home.

Tonight I am completely wiped out. I've already had a shower and a two hour sleep. I hate having a shower but Mom says it's got to be done, because when I come in from football, I'm full of muck. And, there's no way she's letting me on that sofa covered in muck. She carries me up to the shower and I stand up in the bath with my pa's on the side and she washes me down with warm water. It's not too bad as it goes, but if she puts that shower head near my face, it's all over. I hate when she does that and I usually mange to jump out. When it's over, she wraps me in a big towel, makes me look like a pussy, laughs at my sad face, then dries me off. When she's done I shake off. I'm only allowed to do that in the bathroom.

I can't wait for the next game!

Hello,

It has been a while! I've been a busy Lizzie as usual. Today was a lonely day. It felt like Mom was away forever. Mom calls this day WORK. On this day she hops out of bed and goes straight downstairs. On this day, we rarely have time for a cuddle until later, when she gets home. A pat is as much as I can hope for. So I can't be bothered to get up. Mom goes downstairs first and then after a while, she either calls me, or curiosity gets the better of me or the smell of toast. OK, it's the toast! This day, Mom takes me to the park because she doesn't have time to take me to the Slopes. And sometimes I'm naughty. Mom calls me BAD GIRL when I'm naughty. The thing is; the park is a bit boring. My Mom brings the ball thrower with us but after a while, I get bored with it. I'm use to, as you know, the slopes, the games, oh the games! Round the Mound, Hide and Seek, The Back-flips, etc.

The park is not exciting. I have to make it exciting. So, If a little person comes through, I run over to them, drop the ball in front of their feet, in the hope that they will throw it for me. They usually do. I do this often and Mom gets angry sometimes because she has to run around after me. And because sometimes, people are in a hurry and don't want to throw the ball for me.

One time I ran out of the park and Mom got very, very angry and I don't know why. That time she made me sit and shouted some gobbledy gook I didn't even understand. BAD GIRL was said a lot. I understood that alright!

Sometimes in the park the little people play football and Mom lets me join in. The little people like playing with me and let me nose the ball into the air. Football is my favorite game. Sometimes I play it for a long time. One time I tackled the ball well and the little person fell over me. I carried on, I was so excited. The little people call me by my name, they know me well and call me the Footballing Dog. FOOTBALL, is another word I know very well. If Mom says 'go get the football', I know what she means. The park is not boring, if the little people are playing football. One time, Mom took me to another park, where there were lots of little people playing football and they let me play with them for a whole game. I was exhausted afterwards!

Another time I got so bored in the park that I searched out a stick. Mom doesn't like me to have sticks but I love them. Sticks really do it for me sometimes. When I first come across a stick, I run round like I've just discovered the best dog bone ever. I bound around, practically bouncing off the ground. Then I drop it in front of Mom to throw it for me. Mom never looks happy about it and sometimes she ignores me and throws the stick in the bin or in the bushes so I can't reach it.

The worse day ever in the park, was when I found a stick and Mom gave in and through it for me. She through it a long way and I bounded up to it. The stick bounced and I landed on the stick and it went into my mouth and hurt me badly. I yelped and yelped. Mom came running over. I was in shock and trembling all over. Mom tried to cuddle me. Then she picked me up and put me in the car. Next thing I know, I'm in the dog hospital and a big person in a white coat is looking down my throat. I am afraid now, very afraid. The man, picks me up and takes me down stairs. Mom calls me petal and tells me I'm a good girl and that I'm going to be OK. It felt like Mom was gone forever that day. I had a long sleep and don't remember much else.

After that day, I couldn't go off the lead for what seemed like, forever too. My throat was very sore. I had to have liquid food and that was sooooooo gross. Mom said NO STICKS ever again. And I always know when she means business!

I'm not mad about sticks anymore and I don't them out now. And if I see one, Mom reminds me of that day!

Happy New Year

Hello,

Christmas was ok. I was unsettled in myself. I don't know why, but I think I missed Mom. Portmouth was good. I like seeing my Dads family. They're very nice to me and I love playing with the little people and love the walks by the sea, but I miss Mom.

Dad lives in the country now not too far from Whitstable. I don't really like it there. I like the seaside. Dad takes me out for walks but I just want to go back home again. I hate the gun shots. There's always gunshots in the country. They make me nervous and there's no beach, no pebbles and no long grass to play hide and seek in. I love my Dad, but I am always happy to get home.

Dad dropped me home after Christmas. Mom wasn't there. He dropped me in the door and patted me and went on his way. The house was quiet, but I knew Mom would come home soon. I went into the kitchen and had a drink of water and ate some food, that she had left for me in my bowl. Then I went and sat in the window, did some people watching and waited for Mom to come home.

A while later, Mom's car pulled up. I always know when she's coming home, because I know the the sound of her car. Mom always waves at me from inside the car and I get very excited. I wag my tail and my bum a lot and I can't stop myself. This time though, I fell off the back of the sofa between the window and the sofa. I got a bit of a shock. I got over over excited and slipped but I didn't hurt myself. When Mom came in the door, I ran to her and jumped all over her and gave her lots of kisses. I was so happy to see her and so excited, because I knew where she was going to take me, as soon as she was ready. The Slopes, Yahoo! Mom always takes me to the slopes, when I get home from a holiday. It's awesome really. On the way there in the car, I can't sit still at all. I jump from the back of the car, into the front seat and then from the front seat into the back again. I just can't wait to get there. And then I go mental on the slopes and Mom laughs a lot at me because I go so mental. I just want to do everything all at once. And I do. She does everything with me. Pebble throwing, ball throwing, running through the long grass and most of all, another favourite game of mine, Round The Mound.

Mom names it that, because it's a little hill on the slopes. When we get to Round The Mound, I run and I hide at the very top of it, behind some long grass. I peek out, just popping my head above the long grass. Mom pretends to throw a stone and then I run round the mound up into the slopes and back again. Then we do the same again, until I'm out of breath. Sometimes I run round the mound, down onto the beach and run straight into the sea for a swim and a drink. Mom tells me not to drink the sea water but I can't help it. I then run back up into the slopes, behind the mound and we do it all over again, about a zillion times. Mostly until Mom's arm starts to fall off or until she's exhausted too.

When I got back the other day we went and played Round The Mound. I had a great time and felt very happy to be home. When we got back home, we had lunch together and then I had a super sleep on our new sofa. I'm not supposed to really get on the new sofa but Mom puts my blanket on there so I can get on it. Mom's cool!

Christmas

Hello,

I am now on holiday in Portsmouth with my Dad. I miss Mom, but I know I will see her soon. In Portsmouth I get to play with my cousins and see my grandparents. I like seeing them because they take me to the seaside and buy me lots of new toys. And I get treats. Mom's going to Spain this year and she gave me lots of kisses on the head, as I was leaving the house. She cried again this morning and we had a cuddle. But I will see her in a few days though and we will once again, visit the slopes.

Dad came to pick me up last night and I played with him, while he spoke to Mom. They are friendly-ish now. That is good because I get to see them both, but it is strange still. When I come home from Dads, I sulk for a while and I don't go into Moms bed the first night. It takes me a while to settle in again. It's kind of weird really, having two homes. But I know I'm lucky, some dogs don't have any home. Mom says that to me alot. Mom is good though she gives me my space.

I can't wait to see her again to do my back-flips and play football.

By the way I managed to find to boys in the park the other day to play football with. I headed the ball a few times, tackled them and ran round the basketball court with them and exhausted myself. This time though I bit my own tongue and it was bleeding. The boys were nice and had a look at it for me. But I just wanted to carry on. Mom stood and watched and made sure I didn't pop the ball. I'm not allowed to do that in a real game. The boys were impressed with my skills and said they wanted to train with me, so they could pick up there speed. They said, I'm very fast. And I am, I know I am. Mom thinks I'm great too. Can't wait for the next game.

Guess what I'm getting for Christmas.

Happy Christmas.

Sunday, A Treasured Day

Today I had a lie in with Mom. I love this day because this is the day I get to spent all day with Mom. I use to spend it with Mom and Dad. So sometimes I feel sad, because we don't spend it together any more.

The first thing we do is lie on her bed for a long time. Mom gives me lots of strokes and then we get up and have breakfast. I always have toast but on this day Mom sometimes gives me meat. It's red and crispy and very tasty. But today we went to the slopes and had breakfast after my big walk. It was fun. I ran out in to the sea and back in again and again. I did lots of back-flips and ran through the long grass. I played with some little people too and then after we went to the beach cafe. I'm allowed to go in and sit down next to Mom while she eats her breakfast. The lady there gives me a hot sausage, every time I go there. She's very nice to me and gives me strokes and calls me by my name. Today I met another puppy, a black lasbrador and he licked my face. I like puppies but I don't like big dogs.

Later mom's friend Naomi came to see us and she took me for another walk on the way home. She threw the ball for me lots of times. Mom was happy today. Some days Mom is not happy. Sometimes she is sad and she cries. When she does that, I lick her tears and try to make it all better. It makes her smile at me and she gets up and does things at home. She cries less and less now.

When we got home today Mom went away and I went to sleep until she came home again. When she came in, she had some bags. I always sniff the bags because sometimes she will bring me a treat and a new ball. Today she bought me a new football and we went to the park to play with it. There, I met some little people and they played football with me. They know my name and I remember them from last time. They like playing football with me. Today I hit the ball in the air again with my head and they tried to tackle me with the ball. I ran around with them and they laughed a lot. I love playing football with them. I was very tired afterwards and Mom had to take me home for some water. When I got home I drank lots and lots and had to lie down for a while. Mom laughed at me and stroked me to calm me down as I was still very excited.

Afterwards I had my dinner and then I went to sleep. Mom fell asleep too.

I love this day.

Explosions in The Sea

This morning I'n not a happy doggy. Mom has the morning off and she was going to take me out to the sopes again but I am afraid of the noise. THE NOISE is something that happens out in the middle of the sea. Mom says they're explosions. What ever they are they scare me to death. My ears are very sensitive and to me it sounds like an earthquake. I tremble all over and refuse to go outside. This upsets Mom because it disrupts her day too. Mom gives me lots of cuddles but I usually just get in my cosy bed and huddle up til the earthquake has passed. Life is hard sometimes!

Here is a some other things I don't like:

• I hate it when Mom gets out the Alien. She calls it the hoover. I chase after it and bark at it and try to bite it's head off.
• I hate the sweeping brush and the mop. I run at them and away from them. If the sweeping brush is standing next to my dinner bowl. I stay away.
• I hate feet; oh those horrible smelly things. Feet make me nervous. If anyone touches me with their feet, I growl very loudly.
• I absolutely and resolutely hate cats. I know the word CAT very well. If someone says the word CAT. I run out in to the back garden and go mental. Our neighbour has cats. They always come into the garden and I don't even have to see them. I KNOW they're there. Mom says I have a sixth sence.
• I hate going to the woods because I hear gun shots and I'm afraid of those too.
• Every year I dread fireworks night. It's the worse night of my life. Mom puts me on the sofa, wrapped in a blanket with cushions all around me and gives me Rescue Remedy to calm me. It works a little.
• I hate that my Mom and Dad are not together any more.

Things I Love:

• My Mom and Dad.
• The seaside.
• Little people, because they throw stones for me and run fast with a ball.
• I love running through long grass.
• I love doing back-flips.
• I love buttered toast in the morning. Mom gives me a little bit every morning. I love the taste of the butter and the crunchyness.
• I love sneaking upstairs at night night, and getting onto Moms bed, when she's asleep. It's so cosy and warm.
• I love waking up with Mom. She gives me lots of strokes. Sometimes I play-fight with her on the bed. She laughs and calls me petal. She calls me busy lizzie too.
• I love sitting on the back of the sofa, people watching out the window. If I see someone I know I wag my tail a lot and wriggle my bum. Everybody smiles at me in the window
• I absolutely and resolutely love football. I play football as much as I can with the little boys in the park. Last year I was in the newspaper, playing with the local school boys. The paper said I'm a very skilled player. They call me the Woofing Winger and there's photo's of me tackling and heading the ball. I would play football everyday if I could.
• I love running out to sea when the tide is out. Mom throws a stone all the way out there, which is amazing. I don't know how she can do that but I run out as far as I can, splash around in puddles and then come back again. Mom calls me Thunder when I do that.
• And of course I love my food. Sometimes Mom gets me a bone from the butchers. She says it keeps me happy.

I think the explosions have stopped so Mom will take me out. Later.